Nerd Church - Beautiful Failure

Warning: some discussion of Anxiety and Depression, brief ref. to abusive friendship

I'm not a fan of failing.

And I know, I know, all the dude-bros and productivity coaches and all that will be like, 'failure is a stepping stone to success!' or some sh**, but it doesn't change the fact that I don't like failing.

I mean, no-one likes failing, if we're being perfectly honest.

I, especially, don't like being Wrong (yes, with the capital W,) - my Anxiety and Depression (more of those capital letters,) tend to latch onto being Wrong and run with it.

Nerd Church - Putting Self-Care At The Top Of My To-Do List

I've had to remind myself so many times, over the years, that it's best to take things one step at a time.

...That I only have two hands.

...That I actually get more done when I relax.

And yet... it's still so hard to do.

Month(s) in Review(s) - October + November 2023

 

Yes, this post covers two months.

No, I have not done that before.

But I was already pretty busy/lacking in time in October, and then November...

Well, my criteria for a 'good month' in the hellstorm of 2023 is one where no-one I care about (human or animal,) dies, almost dies, or has a life-changing diagnosis.

Nerd Church - Entropy

 

Sometimes you just need to take things a step at a time.

Sometimes it's just about putting that one metaphorical foot in front of the other - not doing too much, not trying too hard. 

Just. Keeping. Steady.

Because in a universe that tends towards entropy, stasis is progress.

Entropy, just to letcha know, is a scientific concept/rule...

Nerd Church - Short Story: Mornings Dawn, Whether You Want Them To Or Not

 

Originally published in the Medium publication Promptly Written, for the quote-prompt '“Some people live just looking for someone to die for.”― Dominic Riccitello' set by Ravyne Hawke.

Warning: this story deals with grief a lot, as well as generally discussing death and related topics.

Mornings Dawn, Whether You Want Them To Or Not

Image by Martina Bulková from Pixabay

Nerd Church - With Respect (Remembrance, and The Call For Peace)

Warning: this post discusses war, death, and atrocities

Some people in the media and politics somehow think that's it's disrespectful to protest for peace on this particular weekend. This post is my response to them.

Nerd Church - The Writer Diaries: The Words Need To Be Out There, Somewhere

Warning: brief references to Depression and Anxiety

A lot of the time, when I write, it's not so much a choice as an exorcism.

(Metaphorically, ofc 😅 )

Don't get me wrong - I love writing.

But sometimes it's the case that, if I don't do it, these words are gonna rattle around my head and drive me to distraction.

Not necessarily in a bad way. It's just... they gotta come out, y'know?

Nerd Church - Short Story: Bex Is On Her Own

Originally published in the Medium publication Promptly Written, for the following prompt set by Ravyne Hawke:

Use any or all of the following concepts for a story:

— ancient runes/ruins
— a ghostly appearance
— danger is afoot!

Content Warning: I’m not sure what happened to this woman, but I don’t think it was anything good — I felt like I should add a warning, but it was kind of difficult to figure out what for exactly. So just be *waves hands* generally careful!

Bex Is On Her Own

A horror-ish short story

Nerd Church - The World In A Spin

 

I recently took up spinning my own yarn from wool - because apparently I wasn't doing enough weird old-timey crafts for my brain's liking.

So, yeah, in addition to my previous heritage (i.e. ye olde timey,) crafts - knitting, weaving, embroidery, and cross-stitch - I now also spin wool fibre into yarn.

...Honestly sometimes my brain just, entirely out-of-the-blue, is like, 'we should learn how to abseil while painting stained glass windows!'* and I'm just like, 'yeah, sure, why not?'

(I do some non-heritage crafts too. Because I am like this, apparently. 😅)

*Don't panic, it hasn't actually suggested doing that. Yet.

Anyhow, it got me to thinking - we don't know enough about how stuff gets made, about where stuff comes from.

We in the modern world - especially in the West and the global North - have become so far removed from the means and methods of production that we can't even fathom it any more.

(Can you tell I was raised by South Wales Valleys (i.e. Socialist,) working-class hippies? Yeah? Great. 😅)

Month In Review(s) - September 2023

September.

(Yes, I know we're halfway through October - I have a lot of metaphorical plates spinning, and sometimes I drop one 😅 )

Iesu Effing Grist, September.

Well, it wasn't the worst month of this year - by a long shot. But it, uh... it crammed a whole lot of stuff in there.

...I am very, very, tired.

Nerd Church - My Kind Of Horror

Warning: this post discusses all kinds of general horror themes (as you probably guessed,) as well as briefly mentioning mental health problems

I love horror - films, books, whatever, I am there.

Perhaps that's a bit stereotypical, given I'm a Queer millennial smol emo child with mental health problems, but I figure being scared of fulfilling stereotypes just gives them more power over me - and stereotypes can shove it, tbh - so here we are! Lol.

Nerd Church - Short Story: Some Space

A short story originally published in the Medium publication 'Promptly Written,' and based on a prompt by Ravyne Hawke.

The prompt:

Write a ‘moody’ piece around the following:

— out of this world
— wonderstruck
— a dark night

Some Space

Path descending towards the Rhondda Valley by Gareth James, CC BY-SA 2.0 via Wikimedia Commons

Nerd Church - My Spotify Playlist Is Calling Me Out

...Algorithms are rude, actually.

Nerd Church - The Writer Diaries: Blogging Ain't Easy!

Blogging takes a lot of time and work.

I don't wanna be one of those 'poor me, blogging is so difficult' bloggers, because at the end of the day, if I didn't love it, I could find plenty of other ways to spend my time.

But bloggers do a whole lot more than you might think.

Nerd Church - Short Story: The Greatest Thieves

A short story originally published in the Medium publication 'Promptly Written'

The Greatest Thieves

...do not take jewels.

Image by Enrique Meseguer from Pixabay

Nerd Church - To Love A Loki

 

(Warning: this post discusses low self-esteem and self-hatred. It also briefly mentions self-harm.)

With series 2 of Loki creeping ever-closer (eep!), I thought I'd discuss something about series 1 that tends to get missed in the online talky-talks (aka 'The Discourse™.')

Before we go any further though - this post is gonna have SPOILERS for series 1 of Loki.

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERRRRSSS!!!!!

Month In Review(s) - July 2023

Warning: this post briefly discusses Depression

July. Ugh.

Well... let's look at the positives.

Once again, nobody in my life - either human or animal - died, almost died, or had a life-changing diagnosis.

Which is a low bar for a win, but that's the bar that I have - so it's a win.

Nerd Church - And Yet

 

Honestly, I have no idea. This is one of those posts that just kind of... happened. 😅

General Content Warning for... I don't know. The state of the world? You'll see.

It can feel like you're shouting at the clouds, with the world burning down all around you.

...Who made the world this way, do you know?

Because all we're doing is fighting within systems in systems in systems - and all it does is benefit those few at the top, who've always been well off.

The only division that should matter is between love and hate - and there is a right answer (hint: it's not hate.)

I don't understand how the world can be so beautiful and wonderful and yet...

And yet.

Nerd Church - Watching Tennis With Depression

 

Warning: As you probably figured out from the title, this post discusses Depression.

Disclaimer Time: I'm not any kind of medical, psychological, or mental health professional. These are my own experiences - nothing more, nothing less.

I love watching tennis.

Like I love it.

It's the one sport that I've followed regularly and consistently since I was a kid.

And for a British kid, there's nothing bigger in tennis than the Wimbledon Championships.

Nerd Church - The Nebulousness Of Self-Care (Or 'What Do I Need?!')

Warning: Vague discussions of mental health issues

Disclaimer Time: I am not any sort of psychological, medical, or healthcare professional. I am a chick with an internet connection: nothing more, nothing less.

Does anyone else find it hard to figure out what sort of self-care they need?

Because it's not all bubble baths and scented candles 

- in fact I have to be careful with bubble baths in case my skin allergies freak out, and I don't like lighting candles anywhere near the cats because that's just an accident waiting to happen...

And apart from all that, the consumerist, one-size-fits-all, version of self-care does not, in fact, fit all.