Nerd Church - A Series of Kafkaesque Events

Warning: this post discusses and/or references panic attacks and Anxiety, murder, grief, forced marriage, and systemic failings

There are also some (mild) SPOILERS for Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events.

I recently found myself re-reading Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events.

See, I had been reading Stephen King's IT, but had to leave it mid-read.

I was painstakingly close to the end of IT... but I had to stop - not because of the content, but because when you've been having panic attacks, adding IT to the mix isn't a smart plan. Trust me.

I will finish IT someday, when I'm confident my Anxiety will allow me to - but in the meantime, I needed to find some other reading material.

So I was looking for something that was:

• familiar
• a quick-ish read
• possibly even with pictures to make it just that little bit easier
• yet still with enough of a gothicky edge to keep my emo goblin spaghetti brain happy

...enter A Series of Unfortunate Events.

Unless you're entirely uninterested in gothic and quirky kids/middle grade books, and/or movies, and/or TV shows, you've probably heard of Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events.

But the sad truth is that the truth is sad, and that what you want does not matter. A series of unfortunate events can happen to anyone, no matter what they want.

 

- Lemony Snicket, The Carnivorous Carnival

This is a 13 book series, with each book comprised of 13 chapters (+1 at the very end of The End,) following the sad and troubled lives of Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire - three children who are orphaned at the very beginning of The Bad Beginning.

Since its first publication in the 00s, the series has also become a film with Jim Carrey (which I love,) and a Netflix series with Neil Patrick Harris (which I haven't seen - there's a lot of content out there, don't judge me, I may get to it someday!)

I hadn't re-read this series in a long time - and I was surprised at what I found.

This series is seriously kafkaesque.

Kafkaesque is a word which here means 'reminding someone of the works of Franz Kafka, especially in terms of absurd bureaucratic nightmares.'

- I'm a big Kafka fan, and trust me, there are Kafka vibes everywhere here.

There's no definitive definition of Kafkaesque - it's subjective. So my Kafkaesque isn't the same as your Kafkaesque, if you know what I mean.

...Which means that this is post is based on my understanding of the phrase, and of Kafka's work - you might disagree with any and/or all of my interpretations, and that's ok.

I should also note that this series was written in the 90s/00s, so there are problematic moments.

...To be honest, far fewer problematic moments than I thought they would be, especially when you consider Daniel Handler (the man behind Lemony Snicket) has something of a history of saying stupid sh**.

Given that The Princess Diaries throws the R-slur around, and The Devil Wears Prada ranged from AIDS jokes to consent issues, this series held up surprisingly well.

- There ARE a few problematic moments though, not least when it comes to anyone moving beyond a strict M/F gender binary. I think it's more messy than malicious, but your mileage may vary, so be aware of that.

We meet the Baudelaire orphans, at the beginning of The Bad Beginning, at the moment where they learn they have become orphans. 

The news is broken by Mr Poe, a well-meaning but useless banker (...keep the rhyming-slang to yourself UK people, the international people don't need to know,) who has been placed in charge of the children's money and finding them a place to live. 

He places them with Count Olaf - the villain of the series - who soon comes up with a plan to steal the Baudelaires' inheritance by marrying Violet.

(The whole 'Olaf wants to marry Violet' thing is a lot worse reading as an adult than as a kid. She's fourteen. Fourteen. Olaf is a grown man. Trying to marry this fourteen-year-old girl. *shudders*)

Despite attempting to alert both Mr Poe and their new neighbour that things are bad, the kids get ignored, and end up having to come up with a legal loophole to nullify the marriage - because apparently forced marriage is totally permitted in this jurisdiction.

Olaf gets away, ready to terrify the kids for another 12 books.

(Side note: olaf is the Welsh word for 'last' so I always think of him as 'last count.' ...I amuse myself anyway 😅 )

Mr. Poe meant well, but a jar of mustard probably also means well and would do a better job of keeping the Baudelaires out of danger.

 

- Lemony Snicket, The Austere Academy

The kids are then transferred to the care of their Uncle Monty, who is promptly murdered by Olaf in disguise, and Olaf's transparent disguises make their first appearance.

Olaf's disguises are, in themselves, a completely Kafkaesque thing. 

They are so goddamn obvious that literally even children can easily see through them... but all of the adults are caught up in the Unofficial Count Olaf Checklist™:

1. Count Olaf is a man; anyone who presents as a woman therefore can't be Count Olaf
2. Count Olaf has one eyebrow; anyone who covers their eyebrows is therefore not Count Olaf
3. Count Olaf has a tattoo of an eye on his ankle; anyone who covers their ankle in any way, is therefore not Count Olaf.
4. Anyone who fulfils points 1-3 must automatically be Olaf, even if they're not.

Adults, especially those in authority, follow these 'rules' unquestioningly.

Until we reach The End, this formula is rarely challenged - around book eight, the kids start to realise that they're going to have to disguise themselves, too, in order to make their way in a hostile and increasingly stupid world.

Klaus and Sunny even end up disguising themselves as doctors in The Hostile Hospital - and people believe that they actually are doctors, despite the fact that Sunny is literally a baby. (And that is Kafkaesque as hell.)

they were beginning to see that the crowd would believe just about anything if they thought it was being said by a medical professional. - Lemony Snicket, The Horrible Hospital

It's here, and in The Vile Village, (the previous book,) that the Baudelaires really begin to reach an understanding of an unpalatable truth - society's systems are often tangled and useless, and appearance too often means more than substance.

While the intention is to protect, the rigidity and absurdity of the systems and institutions that the siblings encounter is such that they allow harm to come to the kids, again and again.

Sadly, I think we can all remember instances where public services have failed vulnerable people - whether they be kids or adults.

It's only by breaking free of these systems, and rising above the entrenched nonsense in order to benefit themselves - 

ironically, in the very way that Olaf has done from the beginning for his own villainous reasons 

- that they can continue to survive.

The hospital itself is, imho, something Kafka would be proud of - and, given my experiences of healthcare systems over the last few years, is concerningly close to the truth in some places. 

I especially love that it's only half-built, with the built half being sleek and impressive, and the other half literally just a wooden frame and some plastic sheeting. 

Like... we're all thinking of public building projects that are only a few steps below on the absurdity scale, right? (Or maybe that's just the UK...)

- And Olaf's use of the intercom systems is just genius; evil genius, maybe, but genius all the same.

Bureaucracy is, ultimately, what saves Violet, in this book, when Klaus, dressed as a doctor, insists that the paperwork for her 'operation' hasn't been completed, giving the siblings enough time to escape. 

His confidence in front of the crowd leaves them unquestioned for long enough to give them a chance at survival, and it's here that they really learn that manipulating the very systems that have failed them - again, much as Olaf has done - is the only way that they're all going to live.

 

The culmination of the Kafkaesque elements in A Series of Unfortunate Events is, to me at least, The Penultimate Peril (book 12,) and the events at the Hotel Denouement.

It's this book that brings a myriad of the series' characters together for the denouement - the crescendo - of all that came before.

It's also this book that sees the children confronted most bleakly with the reality that social systems will not help them, when they are reunited with Justice Strauss and Jerome Squalor - two more well-meaning people who are ultimately unhelpful.

This all leads to a frankly bizarre and surreal trial process (hi Kafka, there you are!) that ultimately shows the kids that they can only ever rely on each other 

- the systems and processes of the society they live in are, unbeknown to those trying to do the right thing, irreparably corrupt and abusable. Not to mention overly-complicated.

The only thing that can withstand the 'world's treachery' is family.

“Who will take care of us out there?" Klaus said, looking out on the flat horizon.
"Nobody," Violet said. "We'll have to take care of ourselves. We'll have to be self-sustaining."

 

- Lemony Snicket, The Vile Village

The next Nerd Church post will be on 6th July 2025 - hope to see you there!

More from me:

• Nerd Church - Even-Franz-Freaking-Kafka

• Nerd Church - The Writer Diaries: My Brain Is Unpredictable, Right Now

✨Rattles digital tip jar✨