Leaving the cinema after watching Avengers: Infinity War, The Bestie turned to me and said:
'Do you get why I said that once you've seen it, you really wanna watch it again, like, straight away?!'
There are spoilers in this post.
This post is essentially all MASSIVE spoilers.
Spoilers, spoilers, spoilers!
All the spoilers, all of the time!
THERE ARE SPOILERS!
Ok, I think we have now established that there are spoilers.
|Via Marvel Studios @ Giphy|
I have some Infinity War-related thoughts, dearest Nerdlets!
For the record, this is just my opinion - I hope you really enjoyed Infinity War, and I'm super-pleased for you if you loved it! 💖
It was ok. No, I'm not gonna lie and say that it was the best thing I've ever seen. You guys know that I don't lie to you.
I liked it, and reeeeeally enjoyed it.
But I want to wait until Part 2 to make a final judgement.
There's still so much they could f**k up, and I have a few issues with what they've done already - not many!!!!
Overall I think they did really well. Doesn't mean I liked everything about though.
The Black Guy Dies First trope:
Idris Elba's Heimdall is the first named character to die.
Do better Marvel. It's not a good trope. It's actually usually considered a racist trope. #JustSaying
- Pepper Potts
- Black Widow/Natasha Romanoff
Yup. Check, check, and check.
Do they talk to each other?
Gamora talks to Nebula a li'l bit - not much, but it happens.
And on the battle field Wanda, Natasha, and Okoye have a li'l chatty-chat.
Yup. Fine on that score too.
Do they talk about anything except dudes?
Erm... kind of.
Gamora tells Nebula she's sorry... but she's sorry because of what Thanos is doing to her, and Thanos is a dude.
(A dude who tortures one daughter and kills another; not good things happening to women there.)
Wanda, Natasha and Okoye do talk to each other on the battle field, but the main point of their convo is to tell Wanda to get to Vision - who's a dude.
Okoye's questioning of why tf they hadn't used Wanda in the battle before now seems to be directed at Natasha, but it's shouted across a battlefield... she could be talking to anyone.
So, I think this is a pass, but a cautious one.
Still, we're doing better than a lot of other superhero movies (lookin' at you, Doctor Strange,) and it's good to see some progress on that.
On Peter Quill/Star Lord:
(This section contains spoilers for the Guardians of the Galaxy films)
Why didn't they mention that Quill can touch the effing stones?! Albeit he can't touch them for long, and probably not all of them at once.
But still, worth mentioning yeah? Might come in handy????
There's gotta be *some* benefit to being the son of an actual f**king planet!
Nope. No. No. No. No. No.
I refuse to accept that Loki dies within the first half hour or however long it was, never to return.
Fix it Marvel. Fix it.
If you refuse to fix it, you must grant us a long naked flashback in the sequel. Yes, I said naked. I don't make the rules, I just enforce them.*
I'm hoping this is a Jean Grey scenario, rather than an Uncle Ben one.
*Ok, maybe I make them - but there's an army behind me on this.
Tony not calling Steve:
GROW THE F**K UP STARK!
I know you're upset, but literally the entire UNIVERSE at stake here!
And you clearly want to call him, you carry the phone with only his number in it FOR A RUN IN THE PARK. Just call. Simple.
Yes, I know that this is totally in character for Tony Stark.
I'm actually annoyed at TONY, not the film, for this one. #FangirlProblems 😉
Vision and the Scarlet Witch's smooch times:
Dear Lord, Marvel, STOP TRYING TO MAKE US CARE ABOUT THESE TWO.
Like, most of us honestly couldn't care less.
(And it still stings that you're more willing to go with a robot love story than a Queer one.)
And you could've cut at least 10 minutes of them faffing around Edinburgh - because dude, what exactly was the point of that whole thing?!
I like them individually, but as a couple? NO-ONE GIVES A SH** MARVEL!
Literally everyone had more chemistry than these two. ARGH!!!!
Controversial opinion: the ending was lazy writing.
Because we knew, the moment literally half the superheroes disappeared, including those who have sequels in production, that it wasn't gonna stick.
Not that death often sticks in Marvel, but you have to leave some jeopardy there for f**k's sake!
Don't get me wrong, I want them back. Not least because THEY TOUCHED MY BUCKY BEAR AND HOW DARE THEY!!! GIVE HIM BACK RIGHT NOW!!!!!
(Also, Cap searching the leaves for any sign of Bucky? Way more emotional than Wanda grieving for Vision. #GiveCaptainAmericaABoyfriend.)
But... I'm just hoping they deal with it in a way which is both semi-believable and somewhat-satisfying.
Fingers crossed they can write their way out of this corner in a way that does that.
Good Lord, the pacing was all over the place. I can't believe no-one else seems to have noticed it.
I get that they had A LOT of sh** to cram in, but it's like they thought: 'we'll fix it in editing!' and then... just didn't.
It was like, they spent a long time on things which DID NOT need it, included scenes that were actually completely unnecessary (like the stuff in Edinburgh) and then rushed through the stuff we could've spent more time on (like... Wakanda; they really didn't use the setting very well there.)
And some of the jumps were... look, I know that we were following a butt-tonne of characters but they could've streamlined this a lot better.
I think there could've been less action too - it actually makes a bigger impact on the action you do have when you don't cram too much in; but then, that's a personal thing.
Lemme demonstrate an alternative route for this plot:
The stuff that was pretty awesome:
Thor with the Guardians of the Galaxy:
OMG I love it! XD
From the pirate-angel comments through to the whole 'rabbit' thing - although, really Thor, you totally need animal flashcards!
This was amazing - more please! XD
Peter times two:
I think Spider-Man and Star Lord are at the same level of maturity.
Like, seriously, that was great.
Bucky and Rocket:
I love the way Bucky doesn't even question the whole talking-racoon-on-the-battle-field thing.
Like, is this normal to you, Buck? Did this happen a lot when you were the Winter Soldier?!
I still over-relate to Rocket. Like, he is me. Cynical, opportunistic, easy to please, completely off-the-wall sense of humour.
He's me. Only fluffier.
(On an exceptionally nerdy note: the CGI on Rocket's fur is utterly amazing! I actually wanna touch his fur! It moves when he moves and everything!!!)
Bruce and the Hulk having issues:
Oooooh! Complex emotional sh** going down!
Also, the half-Hulk half-Bruce face intrigues me.
On Spidey's death: