Nerd Church - Transgender People, and Public Toilets

(Warning: This post deals with rape and sexual assault statistics, and transphobia.)



You've likely heard by now that the fool currently in charge of the US has rescinded Obama's guidance on transgender bathrooms.

Maybe you hadn't heard. In which case you might want to go read some stuff and catch up. Go on, go ahead, I'll wait.

Let's be honest - this is a vindictive move to put transgender people (especially kids) in danger, from a biased and malicious administration.

Why? Let me explain:

• By saying transgender people can't use their preferred public loos, you're saying transgender people are not 'real' men, women, or non-binary people. Which is a) bigoted, and b) inaccurate. #CallThemAsISeeThem

• You're saying transgender people - especially transgender women - are an inherent threat to cisgender women, and/or are in some way corrupted. They are not.

• You're forcing people who would not feel comfortable in a men's loos, to go in, wearing female clothing. There is a high chance of them getting beaten up - or worse. And yes, it happens.

• You're forcing people to out themselves before they're ready, or in a situation which may be unsafe.

But what about the chance of sexual assault in the women's loos?

OK, I'm going to break this down nice and slow.

Because the point here isn't really about assault, it's about rights, but if you want me to deal with this nonsense I will:

• Transgender people are at higher risk of sexual violence in the US than cisgender people (that's with the crime being perpetrated against them.)

• 5-9% of transgender sexual assault survivors in the US were assaulted by police officers - people who are supposed to protect them.

• 98% of rape against college women in the USA is perpetrated by men (not transgender women; TRANSGENDER WOMEN ARE WOMEN.)

• 7/10 rapes in the US are committed by someone who knows the victim, rather than a stranger.

• 50% of rape in the US is committed by people aged 30+, rather than teens or other young people.

• 57% of rape in the US is committed by white people.

Of course a rapist can be anyone - but that's just it, A RAPIST CAN BE ANYONE. You are no more or less safe in the public toilets than you are out of them.

Statistically, a rapist, or perpetrator of sexual assault, in the USA, is most likely to be a cisgender white man, over the age of 30, who is known to the victim.

Transgender people are at higher risk of sexual assault than cisgender women.

Support transgender people, vocally, loudly. Help to protect them, because forcing them to use the loos of their birth-assigned gender is NOT RIGHT.

And it's putting more people in danger than it's helping.

'Support transgender people, vocally, loudly'   Click to Tweet

On board with this post? Check out some of these:

• Nerd Church - We Are Strong
• Nerd Church - A Nazi Is A Nazi
• Friday Fics Fix - Loki's Heart
• 5 Simple Rules For Reading and Reviewing LGBTQ+ Books

Friday Fics Fix - Loki's Heart

I'm full of coffee, fanfiction is slowly restoring my faith in humanity, and I have an awesome FrostIron fic with a transgender Loki for you guys! Let's do this!

(Fangirling notes:

FrostIron is where Loki and Tony Stark from the Marvel Cinematic Universe (y'know, the films) have a little something romantic and/or sexual going on.

If you're a regular DORA reader, you'll probably know this.

If you're new here/have somehow avoided my FrostIron obsession: ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE YOU TO THE AWESOMENESS!!!!) 

'...fanfiction is slowly restoring my faith in humanity...' Click to Tweet

In the comics, Loki is all kinds of undefined in terms of both sexuality and gender (something they have resolutely ignored in the films.)

So fic writers, (who are more accepting than your average studio executive,) have, over the years, taken it upon themselves to explore the various avenues Loki's story could have taken.

And that is one of the reasons, my dearest nerdlets, that there is still hope for this planet!









This fanfic is written by a transgender man, about a transgender man - yes, there's such a thing as #ownvoices fanfiction... and it's glorious.

This fic is 18+ only by the way guys - there are sexy-times, and I don't want anyone's parents yelling at me.

Also, pay attention to the warnings the fic author gives, in case there's anything distressing for you in there.









This is written beautifully and honestly... and I just love it!

To be honest, any romance between Tony Stark and Loki has already won half the battle with me, but the college AU and the raw heart of this story is just... this is one I really adored, guys.

via GIPHY

(Fangirling note: AU is Alternate Universe.)

'the raw heart of this story is just...' Click to Tweet

So, without further procrastination, this week's fic is:

Deliver It To My Heart (What Looks So Strong So Delicate) by lary

And that's this week's fic! More next week! :)










Like this post? Try some of these:

• Friday Fics Fix - Resist, Persist
• Friday Fics Fix - And It's Our Time Now If You Want It To Be
• Friday Fics Fix - Meet Cute/Meet Awkward

Comics Wrap-Up - You're the Queen of Pain

Film Trailers

This is more of a featurette maybe, but I'm putting it in the trailers section anyhow #DealWithIt 😎

This is an origin-type-thingy for X-23/Laura from the upcoming X-men film, Logan.

MASSIVE content warning: gore and self-harm.

Other Stuff

And here's some awesome-sauce links related to all things comics I've come across this week:

• Comic Book Resources explained that Jughead's asexuality has been erased in the Riverdale TV series, and that's not ok.

• ChrisVigilante @ Vigilante Reads wrote an awesome review of Avengers: The Children's Crusade.

• Clara Mae @ Women Write About Comics wrote a great post about the realistic depiction of the pitfalls of toxic masculinity in Lego Batman.

• Also on Women Write About Comics, Karen K Burrows wrote about sexist issues with DC's new Odyssey of the Amazons series.

• Megan Cavitt @ Book Riot spotlighted Native Realities - a Native American comics' publisher.

'Some awesome sauce links related to all things comics' - Click to Tweet

Like this post? Try these:

• Comics Wrap-Up - Rusted From the Rain
• Comics Wrap-Up - But I'm No Good, Good, At Lip Service

Really Mini Reviews! - 3 Contemporary F/F (Lesbian) Romances

It's funny isn't it, how there seems to be a lot more support for M/M romance than there is for F/F romance?

That's not to say that M/M romance doesn't deserve support (it totally does!) but F/F romance shouldn't have to linger by the wayside.

Now, I have a habit of reading... pretty much anything I can get my hands on, which includes F/F romances, of course!

But I also tend to go for cheap/on-offer, and free books where possible (I'm broke dammit!) - so in this post, I review 3 short (novella/short story) contemporary F/F books that I managed to snag as freebies. (Woo!)

All three of these books are classified as lesbian romances; there isn't an awful lot of non-lesbian F/F romance out there, which is another reason F/F romance needs more support!

'3 F/F lesbian romances!' Click to tweet

Title: Flashbang

Author: Lee Winter

Verdict:

OK, this one is 18+ only guys, on account of sexy-times.

This is about two journalists at a glitzy Hollywood party.

To be honest, there's not much plot – it's a short pre-sexy-times scene, followed by a sexy-times scene.

But it actually feels really... intimate, and lovely.

It's got real heart, and it's a small snapshot of a relationship that clearly means a lot to the characters involved.

Goodreads – Author's Site

Title: The Morning After

Author: Jae

Amazon: UK - USA

Verdict:

This is really sweet, fluffy, and enjoyable.

Kathryn wakes up at a strange apartment, with a hangover, not remembering much from the night before.

I really loved the stomping all over stereotypes, and the realistic characters, in this.

I also love the conversations between our main characters, lesbians Kathryn and Michelle, and the whole sweet 'when you least expect it' vibe.

If you're looking for something sweet (but not too sweet,) light, and free of sex-scenes, I really recommend this one. It's well written t'boot! :)

However, some people might find some of the language used in the opening date scene ableist towards people with mental health problems. ('Psycho,' 'loony,' - that kind of thing.)

I personally wasn't bothered, but I can see why it would bother a lot of people.

Buy Now UK – Buy Now USA – Goodreads – Author's Site

Title: The Sexy Librarian

Author: Nicolette Dane

Amazon: UK - USA

Verdict:

This one is also 18+ on account of sexy-times.

This was actually less trashy than the title would suggest (or than the cover would suggest...)

There's actual plot here! (Which I know from M/F romance/erotica, isn't always the case!)

Don't get me wrong though – there was still a lot of graphic sexy-times!

What I loved about this one though (aside from the romance stuff) was the real love for books and reading in general that shone through the writing. That was awesome.

Not so great was the occasional... odd verb choice... when it came to the sex scenes. It wasn't terrible. It was just... a bit odd.

Perfect indulgence reading though.

Buy Now UK – Buy Now USA – Goodreads – Author's Site

Like this post? Check some of these out:

• 5 Simple Rules For Reading and Reviewing LGBTQ+ Books
• Mini-Review! - Oranges Are Not The Only Fruit by Jeanette Winterson
• The Bookish Diversity Link List 2017
• My Contemporary YA TBR

Nerd Church - It's All About The Money

Let's talk money, shall we?

With prices climbing, and incomes not doing the same, (plus an unstable global political climate, which often has a knock-on economic effect,) we need to be able to talk openly about all that awkward financial stuff.

Regular readers of DORA might be aware that I am regularly broke.

Don't get me wrong - thanks to the kindness and support of my parents,  and the country and time period I live in, I have a comfortable life that has plenty of privileges.

But I'm very much dependant on my parents. And in my 20s, with retired parents, that's not a position I thought I'd be in.

I work for myself, and if I ever get an additional part-time or temporary job, I'd need it to be the right fit for me because of my mental health problems. Money's nice, but being alive is a priority.

So when it comes to supporting all of the amazing and wonderful causes and creative people out there, I have to say 'no' time and time again.

And that feels bad. Because I would love to be able to give £5 to Cause A and £5 to Person B, but I know that I can't afford to. I donate and/or support when and where I can, and no more.

And I have to somehow convince myself that I have no need to feel guilty - that I have to come first, because otherwise I can't help anyone else.

via GIPHY

So why, if my parents are supporting me, don't I have more spare cash?

Well, I'm saving - or trying to, it's not easy with business expenses, family/friends' birthdays, and low interest rates.

I'd like a house at some point in the future. And enough income to pay the bills for it. I'd also like to do a degree (probably with something like the Open University.)

I'd like to not feel like a burden on my parents, who've already had to help my brother get on his feet.

Basically - I'd like something that's mine. I'd like a future. 

And I know I'm not alone in that - it's a problem that we millennials are looked down on for, and it's a problem that's NOT of our own making.

And I know how tough it is to make money in today's world...

(...particularly when affiliate agreements may or may not have a clause that prevents you from coming straight out and saying 'please use my links to buy things.')

And even monetising your blog is difficult enough - especially if you're not so good with maths.

I'm currently looking into adding ads to DORA, but business things like that leave me totally baffled (thank you suspected dyscalculia,) which means I have to spend more time going through things and trying to understand them than other people do.

Some people think that any monetising of blogs is somehow dishonest. I sure as hell don't.

If you're a blogger, monetise as much as you want to. Because you deserve it.

If you find you've got enough cash to go around? Go ahead and support other creative people and/or causes with it. Because they need it too.

via GIPHY

What am I trying to say in this post, exactly? I'm trying to say that it's ok.

It's ok to have to lean on others - no matter how uncomfortable it may feel; if you need it, then you need it.

It's ok to not be able to help and support other people when you want to - just do what you can, when you can.

• Buy a book by an author from a marginalised group, for example, instead of that bestseller.

• Drop some change in the charity box by the supermarket till.

• Buy the Big Issue (or whatever your local street newspaper is) instead of a gossip magazine

• Do the free stuff - bring traffic to the websites of deserving people and/or causes, promote them online, etc.

And most of all, never feel guilty for having to put your health - mental or physical - first. You've got to have something left to give.





Like this post? Here's some more!:

• Nerd Church - Millennials Are Gonna Get There... Somehow
• A Rough Guide To Supporting Authors When You're Broke
• Nerd Church - Rebel Valentine
• Nerd Church - The Age of Media

Friday Fics Fix - Resist, Persist

(Flashing Images Warning: There are fast and not smoothly-moving gifs in this post which may cause problems to those with photosensitive conditions such as epilepsy or migraines.)




Fanfiction can save the world.

I know, that sounds like a big, idealistic, head-in-the-clouds idea. But f**k it, I'm a bookish rebel, and I believe in people who tell stories dammit!!!!

via GIPHY

Fanfiction does not fear Donald Trump.

(Actually, it comes up with porn involving Trump that would make the man himself wince, but let's ignore that section of the Trump-fics. Because I have to. Because that's just disturbing.)

Fanfiction sees Trump, and says, 'No. Way.'

So this week's fanfic is a double-feature - two fics for the price of one (don't worry, they're both still free,) double your pleasure, and all that jazz.

Two fics which take those shining symbols of justice and equality - the Avengers - and pit them politically against Trump.

Cos there's no way in hell any superhero would support that w**ker.

Also, there's some Loki-ness in there too! Which is awesome (and somewhat hilarious!)

via GIPHY

So, this week's twinned fanfics, written by fic-writer 'shethinksshesabard' are:

The Avengers Watch Donald Trump

and

The Morning After

Keep things awesome - persist and resist! I'll see you next week for more fanfiction.

Like this post? Try these:

• Friday Fics Fix - For You, America
• Friday Fics Fix - Let's Do This
• Nerd Church - We Are Strong

Comics Wrap-Up - Rusted From the Rain

Film Trailers


Another li'l teaser trailer for you, from Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol 2!

Other Stuff

First look at Avengers: Infinity War!!!!

Granted, this featurette feels a little pompous, and there's a lot of milking-it, (did she just dare to say that?! Yes, she did. #DealWithIt,) but still - as long as they don't let the hype out-do the film, it should be awesome!

Do you guys remember the Team Thor vid that was released a few months back?

It was basically a hilarious mockumentary of where Thor and Bruce Banner were during Captain America: Civil War (UK - US).

Well there's now a part 2 - which once again is just awesome.

I love Chris Hemsworth - he needs to be in more comedies; like, really badly!

'Yay! It's settled. We're getting a servant!"

That's all for this week my nerdlets - more comics and superheroes next Thursday, as usual!

Like this post? Check out these:

• Comics Wrap-Up - Pour Some Sugar On Me
• Comics Wrap-Up - But I'm No Good, Good, At Lip Service